H|yO d|arY=)
HaPpY NeW YeAr to U wor!! hahaz wahz this year I J2 l|aozz wor cannot so SlAcK~ le:p But think this year hasn't started too well...lotsa stuff haben FINISH!!! haben finish studying for re-exams, haben touch all e hols hw like math n GP...SAT also on e 6th of Jan n haben prepare anything yet...yeah dun wanna retake SAT again will cost another $90...ARGHZZZ SO MUCH STUFF!!! SUPER JIA LAK!!!...hahz muz really GaMbaTe lotsa le wor!! cannot so shui2 shui2 bian4 bian4 like last year...
hahz last year...hmmmzz not a v satisfying year ba4...slack too much n did badly for promos...hai4 wo3 no chance to go for e OCIP trip to Nepal cuz results too lousy...even now still a bit regret...den bball also kinda going downhill...pro nwun make team this year=( flopped violin exams too...hmmmzz actually it wasn't tt bad a year but juz had no results to show for it...like juz wasted 1 year of my life...
Hmmmzz muz set some goals for this year...think "A" levels will take high priority ba4...violin exams n my students' violin exams too...all hope to do well..."A" levels muz do well cuz hope to get a scholarship den dun have to touch my parents' money to go U!:) den wanna get my Grade 8 violin cert too...cuz if this year dun get den gotta wait till after NS before can take e violin exam again...dunno by tt time whether I still have e time n ability to pass e Grade 8 exams le...Also hope to at least help my students get a cert before I stop teaching them after bout August so tt at least easier for other teachers to take over...hmmmzz academics aside...Well muz also make sure I spend adequate time wif my dear|e too!! hahz meeting u last year was definitely one of e happiest moments in my life wor=)...We may be busier this year n may not contact each other so often...but I'm sure we'll get along juz fine=)...Love u dear!! *smuackzz*

Friendship isn't a big thing...it's a million little things

H|yO d|arY=)
long time no update...hmmmzz not planning to update anytime in e near future actually but juz have sth to write today so I'm here lor...wahhaz...this whole week has been really...eh...*wheezing*...everything is juz happening so fast tt it juz almost seems like a dream...n I've juz woken up from it...well e dream was at best...really happy...and at worst...well...unfinished...n it perhaps filled me with a little of guilt too...for I nearly went against my principles n might have committed a serious mistake...but I have sort of "woken" from it and I'm glad juz to gather e remnants n make a sweet memory of it...in fact I'm even a little relieved for e dream might have turned nasty if it had lingered a little longer...But that doesn't mean I wun get to fulfill this dream...for if I'm fated to do so I will want to continue...and complete tt dream some day...hopefully wif blissful results=)

A hug is a smile of the heart that touches us through the embrace of caring arms

H|yO d|arY=)
Hey, gonna shut this blog down a while...it'll be inactive for a while...sorry to all avid readers!

H|yO d|arY=)
went out wif Shiqin yesterday...met her at Boon Lay...wah first time I go Jurong Point wor...quite a nicey place...den got lotsa nice gift shops dere too...hahaz saw lotsa cut|e stuff tt I can buy for Christmas shopping...juz tt in Boon Lay lah...v s|an...Watched Looney Toons...hahaz lame show wif lotsa crap...quite funny...but I dun l|ke e ACME boss in e show!! Freak|ng gay and super irr|tat|ng...really reminds me of Austin Powers...only it's much worse...
hmmmzz play frenzly against ACJC today...well guess they look more amateur now tt their *star* year 2 player gone l|aozz...not tt he was tt gd also lah...anyway think got beat dem 20-30+ points...think they nvr field their strongest team thou...Cher Han tell me got this gd 1.78m guard called Marco which I didn't see...wah think e j|ao l|an v shud be impressed wif Zurong's performance today he played quite well...today me first time play forward...wah super not xi2 guan4...but OK lah didn't perform too badly:)
Hmmmzz th|nk I lost my pendant from e firtune teller...left it at ACJC=( hahz super sad...have been wear|ng it since 7...den I always v tyco wif it...wonder whether disaster will befall me now I dun have it le=p ...hahaz kz guess it's superstition but juz dun feel comfy without it...hahz th|nk I'll make a tr|p down to AC again go find it...super far=(

A hug is a smile of the heart that touches us through the embrace of caring arms

H|yO d|arY=)
Hmmmzz guess I'm e only guy tt can lose both sides of my contacts in HALF A MONTH...best I really nothing to say bout myself le...lucky it's disposable...if it's like permanent contacts like last time when I lost both sides too I freaking bang man...hahz wonder wat will happen if I wear monthly contacts more than 1 month?
Hoo...Loyalle managed to find my LOTR book in sch...com lab tech found it...thanx man brother...if Jerald ever knew tt I actually lost it...he's gonna blow his top n wun lend me any more cool stuff man...plus I'll have to fork out $30 for a new book!! hahaz juz realized I lose things almost half of my life...in VJ alone lost my pencil box countless times...left bag in BK twice...left passport at malacca on our way to Cameron Highlands...only consolation is tt I always find them back...:p dunnoz how I got those lousy genes sia...my parents totally opposite from me...v careful people...
Hmmzz well dunnoz yz but seems tt this time of e year is always a *breaking* up period for most couples...already I know of 3 who r well separating l|aozz...hahz...u know...mebbe love is not as perfect as I always deem it to be...I'd love to believe otherwise but reality juz continues to expose my extreme naivety in attempting to hold on to tt belief...And seriously experiences like this deal a deep mortal wound to me bcuz it's sth tt I strongly believe in and sth tt I've tried hard to seek...hahaz mebbe fate juz wants me to be a little more patient...Well if tt's e case, I accept ya challenge!
Ah well time sure flies gotta orh orh le...going dunman play ball tml...nitenite n sweet dreamz!

~*You shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever. *~

H|yO d|arY=)
Wah did sth stup|d today...today morning went play tennis...den I was monkeying around wif e ball...den e ball accidentally got stuck in e fence at e top...den went to climb e fence n got e ball...den halfway climbing down slipped and fell down...*ouch* den think my ankle bit twisted l|aozz...hahz feel real dumb manz...
Anyway today finally got down to studying for re- le...wahhaz...so proud of myself...revised Industrial Revolution today...den did a few essay outlines...hahz juz realized how little I studied for prelims man...Now I'm juz grateful I had an "O" for history...hahz dunnoz whether shud study or slack tml...v tempted go Nic's house n thrash e PS in san1 guo3=p wahhaz...N I WANNA SAY...I FEEL FREAK|NG GD NOW TT PW IS OVER MANZ!!-_-"

*I will forever love you, I will forever care, I will forever live my life, wishing you were there, and for as long as I live, I will never walk away, as long as you promise me one thing, If you come to me you'll stay?*

H|yO d|arY=)
Played frenzly match at Singapore American School on Thursday...hahz kanna thrashed 74-49...*sadd|ez*=( some more it's their "B" Boys only some more...hahz could have won lah I think...but first half lagged by 32 points den after tt nvr had a chance of getting back into e game...hmmmzz there will be a second game on 11/12....hope we thrash dem man! Hahz anyway their school is v nice...v big...got huge locker room and even got hair-dryers in dem! Those ang mohs have such a good life in school man=p Hmmzzz got my first glimpse of Guang Yi too...mild-mannered guy...v calm...relatively young...hahaz see how his training goes today...=)
Ah well anyway update u later...Sa'idah wanna use e com le...cya!!

H|yO d|arY=)
Hmmzz watched Matr|x Revolut|ons today...hahaz not bad! l|ked e way they wrapped up e whole story...f|rst t|me | d|dn't come out of e mov|e all confused and blur...hmmmzz dunnoz yz everybody say e end|ng sux...qu|te n|ce watz...esp. liked e war scene...was really super cool...hahz seriously adm|re e Prochawsk| brothers who came up w|f e |dea of e matr|x...
After mov|e went N|c's house do PW presentation...well ended up doing literally nothing except play his PS...guess Karen and Sai'dah have to share e blame too for com|ng 2 hours late...but e person I'm fuck|ng |rr|tated w|f is Loyalle Chin man!! Ser|ously dunnoz wat rotten stuff is actually growing inside his brain...hahz mebbe it's juz my unlucky karma to have met him...|f he comes 3+ hours late like he d|d today...HE |S GONNA GET SOME REAL FUCK|NG SH|T FROM ME MAN!!
Hmmzz tml going woodlands to play frenzly match...Arranged by new coach I think...hehez look|ng forward to |t...long t|me no play frenzly le...hope | dun flop too much...=p

*Anger is only one letter short of danger
If someone betrays you once, it is his fault;
If he betrays you twice, it is your fault.*

H|yO d|arY=)
Hmmmzz yesterday was very *lucky*...was walking out wif Ah Peng go out buy bread before training den kanna *bombed* by some stupid bird...n e bird super accu juz bomb 1 time den bomb onto my nose le...den dripped onto my hand and shirt some more...WTH!!! Hahz After tt thot of 4 numbers to give my mother to go buy 4-D...nvr strike=( Hahz if I ever catch tt stupid bird again, I gonna stuff up his ass man!
Anyway seems e coach thing has been confirmed le...hahz my heart feels heavy juz thinking of it...it's really pricking my conscience...Juz hope tt it works out well in e end lah ...ha|zzz...ah well shall not think about *sadd|ez* things le...I shall go watch OLD MASTER Q (lao3 fu1 zi3)wif my sis le...cya!

H|yO d|arY=)
Today was super slack day...Morning went to watch Ong Bak Muay Thai Warrior...hahaz was quite a cool show...they really meant it when they said it was non-stop action...it's like fihgt scenes make up for about 3/4 of e show...but den after a while e fight scenes became a bit draggy le cuz there were juz too many of dem...but den some of the fight scenes were really breathtaking and heart-stopping...and also it had a happy ending (sort of) so eh...quite a gd show lah=p
After movie went Peng's house to play mahjong with Zurong and Peng...hahz first time we couldn't find 4 pple for mahjong cuz they r either studying or out or dun want to play...but anyway 3 pple mahjong quite fun lah...Zurong was like super hot...won $15 in all! (considering 1 dai2 was $0.10) Well I won a bit too...so well dun need to say who was down on his luck today le...Anyway rewarded myself with a chocolate milk bread and potato bun from Q Bread from my little winnings...n they were *Yummy*!!=)
hmmmzz juz got news today tt e coach thing in e end still succeeded le...hahz dunno whether to feel happy or sad...If e RI coach is tt gd of course he will add a championship dimension to our team but yet I feel as if I'm back-stabbing e current coach like tt and it's seriously weighing against my conscience...hahz e budget is a prob too...wonder wat my parents will say about paying about $50 every month juz for training? Though guess this is a minor prob compared to wat I feel lah...Anyway meeting tml to finalize details...hahz my heart feels heavy juz thinking bout it...
Ah well lastly all e best to those taking AO level Chinese exams tml!=)

*I've learnt to accept life and death, but sometimes I still worry about what lies between*

H|yO d|arY=)
Ah well...PW flopped juz as expected...but much worst than I actually thought...Yeah...last 2 speakers Nic and Loyalle actually had to go without powerpoint slides...Partly my fault I guess cuz think I forgot to save Nic's part=p but ah well wouldn't have been much better wif his slides anyway...hahz Nic was SUPER pissed...not even his cold cocktail crepe could cool him down...hmmmzz speaking of crepes...yesterday was e first time tt I ate it wor...n it is *SLURPZZZ* YUMMY!!=> ordered e Hot Peach Custard Crepe...e skin was crispy den inside e stuff like hot sweet yoghurt oozing down ya throat wif crunchy delicious peach cubes...hmmmzz guess I dun make it sound TT appetising but it was yummy all the same!!=)
Today went school...or rather met Justin cliff Nic Bryan Lyndon Loyalle at e school bus stop...went Mac to eat breakfast...had intended to be guai and attend math lec after breakfast but well...=p went first to play Bumper Car but found out that it only opened at 6.30p.m. (mebbe cuz Lifen wasn't dere=p) so went cycling instead...Eugene Siew Sze and Glenda joined us too...Anyway we cycled a HELL LOT sia...cuz e bicycle shop had this special promotion of 3 hours rent at an hourly rate...which translated into 6 bucks for 3 hours (plus a complimentary mineral water)...super worth it...den we cycled from 11.45 to about 1.30 (started raining heavily den) cycled more than 20 k I think...from bicycle shop to sailing club den went back all e way back to DHS and back to the bicycle shop...sat until my ass nearly constipated...=p
Den after tt went back sch for lunch...coincidentally saw Lifen in sch den was feeling bit bo liao so went Bishan wif her...wor long time nvr go le but still so crowded wif pple playing MAGIC and stuff...ah well anyway was a fun day today! think tml going watch Matrix wif e bballers...ah well my Dad ask me eat durian l|aozz...hahaz long time no eat le...cya@!!=)

*All the water in the world cannot drown you, unless it gets inside*

Yo Br0tH3r...
Hiyo d|ary...Long Time No See! Sure Miss you lots wor...hahz my promos did quite poorly wor B O O O...BOOO!! *jeers* hahaz yeah n my Nepal trip pao4 tang1 le4 wor...*sadd|ez* nvm nvm take it as got more time to go dating lah=p Gotta do Physics and History re-papers...muz gambate and do well for dem wor...if not gonna drop history le...which eh...bit s|anzz lah...hahaz mebbe like wat Bang Wei say...I juz love living on the edge man!=)
Today went to look for violin scores...dun have...hahz den end up went Centrepoint go kia kia...wanted to catch Ong Bak...but think got lotsa pple wanna watch so wait den go wif dem lah!=) hahaz long time no watch movie le...sure hope Chinese AO and PW faster finish!! den can do stuff like go KTV, outings and stuff! hahz but some pple wun really enjoy their hols wor I think=( hope our last attempt at appealing will work...if not me n many others'll be really sadd|ez wor...hehez muz *pray pray* real hard...hope for e best...meanwhile muz take care wor!
hahz tml informal Oral-P...n it's like our group totally unprepared...s|anzz bet za Ng will have plenty to say about our presentation tml...hehez nvm dun think so much first shall go jogging cheer myself up...den hope chuan2 dao4 qiao2 tou2 zi4 ran2 zhi2 lah...hahaz...gtg le nitenite...

*Sometimes the one you love turns out to be the one,
Who hurts you the most...
And sometimes the friend,
Who takes you into his arms,
And cries when you cry..
Turns out to be the love... *

Yo Br0tH3r...
Hmmmzz have been quite busy lately no time to go online:-< hmmmzz flopped e Physics prac on Sat...I oscillated e pendulum instead of e card...den I forgot to divide my oscillations by 20 and got a bloody curve graph! So No Gradient, No Y-intercept, NO GRAPH, and no value of G....hahaz my physics prac super screwed sia:P hahaz 10 marks gone liao...seems I have to really go pia e theory paper liao...ha|zzz...*pray pray can make it* =gr|ns=
hmmmzz was super pissed wif project work on Fri...esp. wif Loyalle...talk dunno how to use his f**k|ng bra|n...den end up whole group tio scold|ng by Ng...hahz pissed off wif some other pple too...Den end up I also attitude wif Ng den piss him off...hahz PW is damn sad man...everything about it...juz wanna get everything over N done Wif!!
Hey I got selected for e Nepal trip lehz...hahaz talk so much crap for e interview also can tio selected...hahz Sin Yee didn't make it thou:( but well still can some pple tt I know tt r going, like Jialing, Eugene and hahaz vanessa in his group too! Lucky guy man!:) hahz but den hor criteria is tt have to score D for all subs...hmmzz like quite diff like tt...really gotta gambate for promos wor...if not later if bcuz of results cannot go I wun forgive myself man...

*Learn from the mistakes of others You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.*

Yo Br0tH3r...
H|ez long time no see...hmmzz seems like I'm not gonna quit violin after all! Hehez...my teacher say juz go Grade 8 first den see...thou he also quite pessimistic about my results lah:p Hmmmzz tried to compose a score for Wish by S.E.N.S yesterday...e score did not come out too bad=)...sounded pretty much like e original except for e part b4 e "Grandioso" part...shall work on it later at Sonata...
Hmmmzz got e class photos 2 days ago...hmmmzz first time tt I've bought e class photo since e days at Montfort...hahaz...still not v comfortable with photographs with me inside=p Hmmmzz photos did not come out too bad lah...not tt I really care lah...but at least my Mum was pleased tt at least got some sort of expression on my face...hahaz...den Sin Yee said her Mum say I look v playful...really meh? Think I'll upload some of e photos when I have e time...
Ha|zzzz...Has been a few days since I finally deleted those msg le...feels kinda weird now now tt my inbox is completely empty...It's like I always used to give a little peek at those msg every now n den...guess I do regret a little about deleting dem...but well it's for the better gd lah n it's already done so no sense worrying about it=p hahz if only certain things could be deleted as easily...
Hmmmzz went for e Nepal interview on Wednesday...hmmmzz not too gd lah I guess...particularly e part where they ask wat we have to contribute to e trip...didn't really know wat to say...Cuz I dun have really much involvement or experience in overseas community service...hmmmzz pray hard tt can get in:)
Hmmmzz d|d|'s Prelims going along quite well wor...so proud of her *beams* guo3 ran2 nvr gu1 fu4 jie2 de4 qi1 wang4 hahaz but also li2 suo3 dang1 ran2 lah cuz she inherit all my clever genes=p hahaz so bhb!!=p Miss ya lotsa wor...muz catch up online when exams over kz?
Oh yah n lastly HaPpY b|rD-DaY Ke||Yn!! Muz tell me wat nicey prezz|es ya get kz?=>

*Muz p|a Promos MaN*

h|ez d|ary...

You are Differences!

What Ginuwine Song Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

h|ez d|ary...

You are "Welcome to the Caribbean, love."
You're more than a little world-weary, but also
intelligent and you keep your head when things
get dodgy. You're everybody's favorite
drinking buddy, but your stubbornness does get
in the way sometimes.

Which one of Captain Jack Sparrow's bizarre sayings from Pirates of the Caribbean are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hahaz super lame quiz...but heck he is my idol man! :p

h|ez d|ary...
Today went Sungei Buloh for coastal clean-up...hahz chao bo liao dere...juz go dere into e mangrove pick rubbish n talk cock...hahaz found lotsa stuff...got like hundreds of pairs of shoes, wrappers, bottles...still got funny things like mattresses, condoms, shot gun shells?...ah well...was quite slack ah I think whole team only picked 500kg of rubbish...hmmmzz dun care anyway got 5 hours of CIP for 1 hour's work...YEAH~! my first 5 hours...:p After CIP went chiong pool wif Guang Viv n Bang den come back KO...hehez fun day!!
Hmmmzz Friday went watch Pirate of e Caribbean at Bukit Batok...Wor cool show man...nice plot, good story, lotsa action n super cool effects!..esp. when e pirates turn into skeletons under e moonlight...Think CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) is a super cool guy...hahz thou he a bit eh..gay at times lah...hehez make me wanna be a pirate too...like v fun like tt:p hmmmzz juz realized I watch movie v hiong...4 movies this month le...some more still plan to watch Sinbad and mebbe e Italian Job (Got Carlize Theron...hot babe man:P) think I will faster K all these movies next week den go K my books liao:p
Hahz got violin lesson tml...think my Grade 7 results gonna come out le...hahz seriously dun wanna get it back lah...confirm is flop 1z...den sure kanna kao bei by my Dad...wonder wat will be his reaction when I tell him I may not wanna advance to further grades l|ao...hmmzz can't bear to imagine...Hope a miracle happens tml=>
Hmmmzz Shiqin found e Polish poem by Wislawa Syzmborska in Turn Left turn Right...wah e poem super qia4 dang4 for e show no wonder they chose it...beautiful poem too...

Love At First Sight - Wislawa Szymborska
They're both convinced
that a sudden passion joined them.
Such certainty is beautiful,
but uncertainty is more beautiful still.

Since they'd never met before, they're sure
that there'd been nothing between them.
But what's the word from the streets, staircases, hallways -
perhaps they've passed by each other a million times?

I want to ask them
if they don't remember -
a moment face to face
in some revolving door?
perhaps a "sorry" muttered in a crowd?
a curt "wrong number" caught in the receiver?
but I know the answer.
No, they don't remember.

They'd be amazed to hear
that Chance has been toying with them
now for years.
Not quite ready yet
to become their Destiny,
it pushed them close, drove them apart,
it barred their path,
stifling a laugh,
and then leaped aside.

There were signs and signals,
even if they couldn't read them yet.
Perhaps three years ago
or just last Tuesday
a certain leaf fluttered
from one shoulder to another?
Something was dropped and then picked up.
Who knows, maybe the ball that vanished
into childhood's thicket?

There were doorknobs and doorbells
where one touch had covered another
beforehand.
Suitcases checked and standing side by side.
One night, perhaps, the same dream
grown hazy by morning.
Every beginning
is only a sequel, after all,
and the book of events
is always open halfway through.

*Real tears are not those that fall from the eyes and cover the face, but those that fall from the heart and cover the soul*

h|ez d|ary...

Anglo-Chinese School (Independent)

which secondary school (singapore) should you be in?
brought to you by Quizilla

Hmmmzz oh man of all schools!!! I shall go for a makeover of myself...:p

h|ez d|ary...
hmmmzz slacked a lot today wor=( wanted to finish studying econs by this morning...hmmzz but now can only finish it by tml le...hahz market failure is a real killer man...so much stuff to remember!! I maciam going "gaga" l|aozz...hahz n all my Term 3 stuff eh not v coherent yet...need to consolidate all e info one more time n permanently store them in my puny brain...ah well GaMbAtE 2 MySeLf!! No matter wat Muz finish econs by tml! Think better *migrate* far far from my com tml...airport perhaps?:p
Hmmmzz afternoon went out wif Shiqin to go watch Turn Left Turn Right...hahaz guess she was eh...quite shocked by my hair...n she keep on playing wif it!! hmmmzz at least she didn't scream like Glenda n Cheryl:p...hahaz she cut her hair too...no ponytail to pull le!!:( Hmmmzz she still as talkative as ever:) talked quite a bit about her n Nic...hmmmzz Nic looks quite shuai in e Neos...pretty decent too...u got gd taste gal!! hahz muz have been pretty hard for u e last 2 months after he went overseas...sure glad tt u r still getting along fine n looking in e pink of health:) hehez muz keep in contact more often kz?:) All e best in everything...n I'll find some way to pass u e neocard one day...pai se...hahaz certain things dun change much hah?:P
Hmmmzz TLTR is a super cute show...hahaz e parallel plots of Takeshi n Gigi r v hilarious...though a bit far-fetched lah but well couldn't help but feel sad each time they juz seem to pass each other...den I was like almost praying tt fate stop teasing them n faster cheng2 quan2 dem:p...think it's a pretty gd show...simple, cute, funny, romantic, super sweet with gd looking lead actors and actresses...hahaz I dun really ask for more...think I may watch it again:)
Hmmzz signing off to sleep le...waking up later to watch e Wales vs Finland match...t4Ta!

*When you want sth, let it go... If it comes back to u, it is yours to keep...If not, it was never yours to be...*

h|ez d|ary...
Guess wat d|ary? I shaved my head today! Hahaz hmmzz didn't exactly shave everything lah (eh head part only) but well still pretty darned close...hahz actually came about due to a little misunderstanding...I asked e barber for armani and asked him cut shorter...but somehow he thot I was an NS man n ended up shaving my head!! hahaz dunnoz lah...anyway ain't look tt bad...n I feel like a new man again! Like some totally new guy...mebbe it's a signal for me to start afresh=p
hahz got history mass tutorial tml so s|anzz dun wanna wake up early...bracing myself for some serious eh *opinions* about my hair tml...hahaz bet e hist pple will have lots to say...n prob e malau too hahaz meeting her at 1 to study...sure brings back certain memories =)*grins* hmmmzz d|d| gave me some really nice flashes...v touching muz go see...=)
Flash 1
Flash 2
Flash 3
Flash 4
Flash 5

*To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world*

h|ez d|ary...
Watched 2 movies the past 2 days...Yesterday went to watch Down With Love...Hmmmzz e show was quite funny...though the last corny part kinda spoiled everything...Renee Zellweger is quite cute from certain angles=) but I think some of the costumes that they wore in the 60s were quite atrocious looking...Today went to watch SWAT...juz found out today that it stands for Special Weapons and Tactics...hehez typical action movie lah...got a bit boring after a while...but at least the combat scenes r much more realistic than some of the other action movies...And the way the SWAT team handled emergency operations is really cool...Anyway next 2 movies I wanna watch is Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of the Black Pearl and Sinbad!=)
Hmmmzz still haben found my lost GP essay...n I really too lazy to write another one for Chua le...Think i'll juz drag over e hols n hope he forget n pretend tt it never happened...ha|zzz...did some Physics ten-year series today for Physics remedial den realized how much I actually dun know...Think if I dun mug seriously during e hols I'm going to get fairly screwed...hehez anyway reading this really cool story here...quite a well...nostalgic story=)
My husband is a scientist by profession, I love him for his steady-being nature, and I love the warm feeling while lean against his broad shoulder. Three years in the courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, I am getting tired of it, the reasons of me loving him before has now transform into the cause of all the restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive and exquisite when it comes to relationship and feelings, I yearn for romantic moments, as though a little boy yearning for candy. And my husband, is just a contrast of me, his lack of sensitivity, and of all, inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love. One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I want a divorce. "Why?" he asked, shocking. "I am tired, there aren't reasons for everything in the world" I answered. He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thoughts the whole night with cigarette lighted all the times. My feeling of disappointment is getting intense, a man who can't even express his detainment, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked :" What can I do to change your mind?" Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him. Look deep into his eyes and I slowly answered : "Here is a question, if you can find the answer in my heart, I will change my mind, Let say, I love a flower at a mountain cliff, and we both sure that the making you to pick the flower will cause death, will you do it for me?" He said :" I will give you your answer tomorrow...." My heart just sink by listening to his respond. The next morning, he was not around, and I saw a piece of paper with his scratching writing, underneath a glass of warm milk, It goes.... "Dear, I would not pick that flower for you, but please allowed me to further explain the reasons " This first line has already break my heart. I continue reading. "You can only type with computer and always messed up the programs in the PC, and cries in front of screen, I have to saved my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always left the house key behind, I have to save my legs to rush home for opening the door for you. You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city, I have to save my eyes to leads you the way. You always has the cramp whenever your "good friend" approach every month, I have to save my palm so that I can calm the cramp at your tummy. You like to stays indoor, and I worries that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tells you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stared at the computers, and that do no good to your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow older, I can help to clip your nails, and help to removed those annoying white hairs. I will hold your hand, stroll down the beach, enjoying the sunshine and the beautiful sands... tells you the colour of flowers, just like the glow on your young face... Thus, my dear, before I am sure there are someone who loves you more than I do... I would not pick the flower, and die.. " My tears drops on the letters, and blurred the ink of his hand writing... and I resume my reading... "And now, dear... you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied with these answers, please open the door of our house, I am standing there, with your favorites bread and fresh milk... I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, with his hand holding tight on the milk and bread.... Oh I am sure no one ever love me as much, and now I have decided to leave the flower alone...
Hehez so do cherish your loved ones and realize tt they r more often than not loving and thinking of you...=p

*Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and know someone else and expect them to know you*

h|ez d|ary...
Almost didn't want to get up for training today bcuz it was raining and PERFECT for sleeping! Arghz!! Missed my beauty sleep...training was quite fun today...played lotsa match...but suffered from food poisoning and a slight knock on my tailbone halfway during training=( hahz this will be the last training until after promos le...gotta start mugging...super sad=(
Went back Dunman on teacher's Day...hmmmzz nothing much lah...saw Shu-b|rd and Chua...Za Ng went for reservist so nvr see him...went KA eat later...wah lau was so looking forward to eating the Tom Yam noodles there but e shop nvr open...sad sad=( ended up eating cha kway teow and fried macaroni and kopping some of Jerald's Indian rojak=p After tt went to meet up wif e rest to play pool...
Hahz feeling real tired shall go sleep le...nitenite!

*You know u mean so much to me that I am scared to close my eyes & open them & see you not there. But I'm more afraid to leave them open and see you leave me*

h|ez d|ary...
hmmmzz lotsa hype about Mars being the closest to Earth in 66,000 years today...e astronomy club even organized a gathering to invite people to view the phenomenon...wonder yz pple would be so interested in seeing this gigantic red ball with absolutely nothing attractive about it? People can be weird sometimes...or mebbe I'm juz missing out on sth great=p
Today afternoon didn't start too well...Learning Journey was a drag, real drab affair today...slept on the bus, slept during the video(hasn't changed since I visited 3 years ago), walked around aimlessly until it ended at 4...got irritated bcuz it ended so early n I hadn't e brains to bring a PE kit to go back for training...plus well...suddenly ate lotsa vinegar(dunno wat came over me)...wasn't in a good mood so tried to avoid everybody and get home early but Nic called. Agreed to join the class at Chinatown Complex. Got lost while walking there...walked to Tanjong Pagar, Marina South, Far East Square Little India before finally reaching Chinatown half an hour later...hahaz really super blur=p Anyway felt much better after eating the salmon rice and ice cream (Mr. Ng's treat!!!=>) and talking lotsa cock at Swensen's...(",) Found out lotsa funny stuff too...
Hmmmzz suddenly recalling my conversation with Ah Peng on Monday...wat he said is true...e only way we will forget our current "love" will be to find a next 1 to take e place of e current 1...Guess we dun really want to forget our current "love" because we are unable to let go or afraid to lose the happy moments that we had together which are still fresh in our minds...or perhaps we r still wishing that perhaps one day we may be given the chance to be together again? Perhaps both I guess...And it shows when the very mention of these incidents hurts like knives cutting through our very hearts...And we can only hope to hide our hurt by bottling our feelings up...Well, my bottle is overflowing...so I want to say XUWEN, I STILL LOVE U & I REALLY REALLY MISS U!! I WANNA EMBRACE U TIGHT WITH ALL MY HEART AND NVR LET GO!! I LOVE U!!! Hoo...feels SO much better...hehez...=)
Hmmmzz watched League of Extraordinary Men...the show is super cool man!! Very unique story...n lotsa actions n twists...n the Nautilus is super cool man! Captain Nemo quite seh too...his swordsmanship simply amazing...thou actually I dun believe that he nvr got hit by the bullets since he only uses his sword...And Jekyll and Hyde is very cute! Too bad my fav character Allan Quartermain had such a tragic end in the story...Wonder what the end of e show meant for him...hmmmmzz...
Ah well t's all...tata!!

*Answers are not difficult to find when you stop hiding the questions*

h|ez d|ary...
Hey hey feel so happy today...my muscles didn't ache from gym yesterday! Hopefully it's not bcuz I was too slack=p hmmmzz quite sleepy today...cuz yesterday stayed up to update my blog but den my net went bonkers den my entry was lost=( Practically slept during Physics lec...hahaz thou I noticed someone was v happy today sitting wif *ahem ahem*...hahaz shall not say who tt fellow should know best=p
hmmmzz can't go to watch KC n his rock band busking at PS today cuz gotta work=( Heard they are quite good...tt time they impressed a lot of pple during musicfest...hmmzz finding work a bit sianzz now...guess e pay is the only motivation...n mebbe I'm getting a new student today! Hahaz! more $$ *wink*
Hmmzz my com seems to be in *high demand* by the arts fac...think they r piaing history essay..will sign off now...cya!!

*What lies behind us and what lies beyond us are small matters, compared to what lies within us*

What Finding Nemo Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

h|ez d|ary...
Hahz muscles aching badly today...esp. e part juz between e breast n shoulder...muz be bcuz of e chest expanders did at gym yesterday...hmmmzz wonder if my chest got bigger not?=p Nvr really go n check yet...cuz like super bian4 tai4 like tt...hahaz...hope it dun ache so much for training tml...
hmmmzz wanted to watch the League of Extraordinary Gentlemen today...show looks damn cool...but today idn't feel like watching alone...waited for Nic after P.E. but den he couldn't stay out n got no money also...thot of playing badminton but Nic saw Chun Hwee n Jonathan den guess he still quite pissed off wif them...Hmmmzz on e way home was hoping to meet Amelia at e bus stop again like yesterday but no such luck=( hahaz she still as cute n child-like as ever...Really my favourite GEP junior=p
Giving Pamela some "tuition" on Saturday morning...hmmmzz quite surprised tt she requested it...hahaz anyway good to see her working hard for "O"s lah...hope she can follow "him" to his desired JC...hahz but seriously I didn't think she thot so highly of my studies! hahaz hope I dun disappoint...
Hmmmzz 10.45 now too lazy to mug le shall go orh orh! tml's things will take care of itself lah...I hope...n|ten|te n sweet dreamz!

*Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened*

h|ez d|ary...
Hmmzz have been v busy wif preparation of violin exam e whole of last week...hahz really hoped to do well on Friday...but well kinda screwed up again...too nervous I think...think my chances of passing r literally less than 50% le...hahz guess I'm juz not musically inclined lah=p dunnoz whether I shud stop learning if I fail my Grade 7...hmmmzz nvm long way to go b4 e results come out in half a year's time...dun think so much first...
Went to watch Home Run after violin exam...hmmmzz quite a nostalgic show...some really touching scenes...cried in some scenes...lame hah? lucky e cinema was empty if not super pai se...e overall show was quite nice...dunnoz yz e newspapers give it lousy rating...hmmmzz think I'll go d/l e Iranian film tt it was adapted from today...better stock up lotsa tissue paper too=p
After tt went National Library do PW...was super s|an...slacked a bit but still managed to squeeze out some relevant info from 2 books which were either too helpful or not helpful...Went wif Nic later go Suntec eat...Nic made a dedication at e fountain to *...Met up wif Loyalle later b4 going home...
hmmmzz a bit about e NDP last Saturday...first time dere...went wif Yancy...hmmmzz was quite fun!! E Parade was quite exciting...den lotsa v fanciful visual effects n lotsa nice dances and music...best was e fireworks! really beautiful...this year like got lots more than last year's 1z! hahaz damn cool...hmmmzz guess only drawback was e crowd lah...shopping centre on weekend i already buay tahun wat more 60,000 pple in 1 area!?! took 2+ hours to get home...went home super tired ate dinner den KO le...hmmmzz hate to admit it but I think I love Singapore juz a teeny-weeny little bit more=>
hmmzz training yesterday...didn't perform too well=( Monday have to go to e gym to test-try e equipment n work out a gym plan for us...hahz den heard from Viv tt those tt miss NDP celebration had to back-peddle 6 rounds around e running track as eh...*CWO*?!? den Jun Da best still late for CWO den had to back-peddle 10 rounds...super xiong1 sia tt Seet bit mad sometimes...
Hahz gotta pia hw today...chao s|anz!! going mugging le cya!!btw a v cute link here...

*Don't waste your time on someone, who isn't willing to waste their time on you*

h|ez d|ary...
Today National Day celebration...hmmmzz speech seem shorter than usual... thou I think is bcuz Jerald n I talk so much cock...hmmmzz think was v bo liao go sch...only go watch concert...thou e concert was quite nice n funny lah...after tt went to watch Daddy Day Care...v nice show...damn funny n damn lame n really super cute!! hehez after tt went to work...hmmmzz tml gooing to watch NDP wif Yancy..hope it will be another fun-filled day...*Yawn*...gtg le n|tez

*The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them, knowing you can't have them*

h|ez d|ary...
Yesterday was Sin Yee's b|rd-day...hehez me n e 3 band pple n Nic n Su Wern gave her this little milk bottle wif lotsa yummy sweets n marshmallows n chocolates inside...Plus I made a small bottle of stars for her...hmmmzz got e idea from e present tt 3J got for Pam last year...oh yah den Cheryl also suggested adding e Junior milk to her prezzie den everybody was like...'Sin Yee muz kuai4 gao1 zhang3 da4 wor' tt kinda stuff super funny...but hahaz she is quite like a little gal lah=>
Yesterday training was fun...did lotsa fun drills thou at e back got a bit xiong1 wif some PT but hey no kick man=> hmmmzz first time I did 3 point shooting drill...super fun n quite happy wif my result lah...got 6 out of 18...den felt tt my jump shot quite smooth juz tt not too used to taking long range shots...hehez not bad for an ex-center sia=p arghz parents nagging me to sleep le...update ya enxt time cya!!

*It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all*

Took th|s from Pam's journa|...Rea||y n|ce story=)
A young man learns what's most important in life from the guy next door. It had been some time since Jack had seen the old man. College, girls, career, and life itself got in the way. In fact, Jack moved clear across the country in pursuit of his dreams. There, in the rush of his busy life, Jack had little time to think about the past and often no time to spend with his wife and son. He was working on his future, and nothing could stop him.

Over the phone, his mother told him, "Mr. Belser died last night. The funeral is Wednesday." Memories flashed through his mind like an old newsreel as he sat quietly remembering his childhood days. "Jack, did you hear me?" "Oh, sorry, Mom. Yes, I heard you. It's been so long since I thought of him. I'm sorry, but I honestly thought he died years ago," Jack said. "Well, he didn't forget you. Every time I saw him he'd ask how you were doing. He'd reminisce about the many days you spent over 'his side of the fence' as he put it," Mom told him. "I loved that old house he lived in," Jack said. "You know, Jack, after your father died, Mr. Belser stepped in to make sure you had a man's influence in your life," she said. "He's the one who taught me carpentry," he said. "I wouldn't be in this business if it weren't for him. He spent a lot of time teaching me things he thought were important...Mom, I'll be there for the funeral," Jack said.

As busy as he was, he kept his word. Jack caught the next flight to his hometown. Mr. Belser's funeral was small and uneventful. He had no children of his own, and most of his relatives had passed away. The night house next door one more time. Standing in the doorway, Jack paused for moment. It was like crossing over into another dimension, a leap through memories. Every picture, every piece of furniture....Jack stopped suddenly. "What's wrong, Jack?" his Mom asked. "The box is gone," he said. "What box? " Mom asked. " There was a small gold box that he kept locked on top of his desk. I must have asked him a thousand times what was inside. All he'd ever tell me was 'the thing I value most,'" Jack said. It was gone. Everything about the house was exactly how Jack remembered it, except for the box. He figured someone from the Belser family had taken it. "Now I'll never know what was so valuable to him," Jack said. "I better get some sleep. I have an early flight home, Mom."

It had been about two weeks since Mr. Belser died. Returning home from work one day Jack discovered a note in his mailbox. "Signature required on a package. No one at home. Please stop by the main post office within the next three days," the note read.

Early the next day Jack retrieved the package. The small box was old and looked like it had been mailed a hundred years ago. The handwriting was difficult to read, but the return address caught his attention. "Mr. Harold Belser" it read. Jack took the box out to his car and ripped open the package. There inside was the gold box and an envelope. Jack's hands shook as he read the note inside. "Upon my death, please forward this box and its contents to Jack Bennett. It's the thing I valued most in my life." A small key was taped to the letter. His heart racing, as tears filling his eyes, Jack carefully unlocked thebox. There inside he found a beautiful gold pocket watch. Running his fingers slowly over the finely etched casing, he unlatched the cover. Inside he found these words engraved: "Jack, Thanks for your time! Harold Belser." "The thing he valued most...was...my time." Jack held the watch for a few minutes, then called his office and cleared his appointments for the next two days. "Why?" Janet, his assistant asked. "I need some time to spend with my son," he said. "Oh, by the way, Janet...thanks for your time!"

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away

I nvr realized how fragile a heart can be
Until today when I saw how much I had been cheating myself all along...Guess it started wif e GP assignment..."It's better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
Did I agree?
Absolutely. If given a choice I'd have chosen to love again even if it meant e same ending...
But did I disagree?
Perhaps. Bcuz even up to now I've still not been able to face e fact tt things would never be e same again...Bcuz up to now I've still not been able to shed this emotional baggage and get on wif life...Bcuz up to now I am still constantly lying to myself tt I was cool about it when e truth was tt I had been totally shattered and have yet to mend e broken pieces...So, would it have been better not to have loved?
Seeing Zurong n Jingxian today I really admire them...Really really happy for them...For now I dun even have e confidence to trust my own feelings, unsure of whether it is deceiveing me or not...I admit I'm a pretty good liar...to e point tt now I can't even differentiate e black from e white...
Am I really tt physically exhausted in school tt I sleep almost every lesson? Perhaps...or mebbe it could be tt I'm juz getting tired of life...Am I really tt bo chap in everything? Perhaps...or mebbe I'm juz trying to self-destruct to make myself feel better...Do I still love her? Yes. But den in order to love her I must love myself, and if I love myself I have to let go bcuz tt's wat's best for me...She'll also be happier to see me stand up once again...which is all I really want her to be if I truly love her...
I will zhen4 zuo4 qi3 lai2=>

*They say love hides behind every corner, then I must be walking in circles*

h|ez d|ary...
Today was a super slack day...Had lessons until 11.10 den had 6 periods break bcuz I pon GP...Lazed in e com lab den went reading room do some work...P.E. was fun...played soccer...N I scored hat-trick!! Our team won 4-1 YEAH!! hahaz=p...after P.E. Me Nic Bryan Lyndon and Eugene played some soccer ourselves...played corners n free kicks n penalties...penalties was e most fun...e person who scored had to be keeper and the keeper had to do 5 pumping if he nvr save e ball...If he saves he gets -5 pumping n a striker gets 5 pumping if he nvr score e penalty...hehez really had lotsa fun=>
After soccer me n Nic went to play badminton wif e band pple...we were playing league n me n Sin Yee were 1 team...den we beat Nic n Chun Hui 5-0 in our first game...hahaz...skill right?=p (but seriously Sin Yee's badminton is not bad lor) but den later hor lost to 2 pro band pple...played until 7+...After badminton played cards a while before going home...Monday ROCKS!!
hmmmzz super tired now...go practise violin a while den go sleep le...cya!!

* A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your heart*

h|ez d|ary...
Hmmmzz screwed up my violin lesson today...couldn't reme3mber all my scales and played them quite badly...den screwed up my 3 pieces at e pianist's house later...Arghz!! My Grade 7 violin exams juz 12 days away!! Juz realized how much work I still have to put in to ensure at least a decent pass...Hahz really need e Grade 7 cert if not dun think I'll have e confidence n motivation to move on in violin le...Also need it to certify myself as a credible violin teacher...imagine when my students' parents find out I only have a Grade 4 cert...I'll most certainly be out of a job!=p Hmmzz on a lighter note...Mr. Chan's female student quite pretty wor...hehez prep talk wif her a bit at e pianist's juz now..next week muz find out her name n where she study=p hahaz nah juz j/k lah..cannot xiang3 ru4 fei1 fei1...muz concentrate!!=>
Hmmmzz gonna sleep le...need to wake up early tml...can't decide whether shud go run 4.8k or play table tennis wif Shane tml...nvm nvm tml den see...*Yawn* cya!!

No Man is worth your tears, and e one who is, wun make u cry...

h|ez d|ary...
How do u like ya new look? Hahaz I'm quite satisfied with this design actually...dun think I'll change it for quite some time...(Javascript really rocks!)Juz bothered by a few minor cliches...For 1 e marquee can't run smoothly consistently(think it's due to e moving background, really slows down e page processing), hope it will be able to run more smoothly on e faster servers...another prob is e playing of background music...I had originally put a Legends of the Fall midi as e background music but it failed to play so I've decided to do away wif it...Also did away wif a password system tt I had originally installed...no point lah...I like e digital clock though=p
Hmmmzz stayed up until 4 this morning to finish e website...really bushed...Morning had to wake up early to go Choa chu Kang to prepare for Music Marathon...Hahz can't believe tt it is held outside e NTUC so tt it can be used as a sidewalk advertisement for e school! Anyway lotsa pple didn't turn up and e teachers ended up having to perform too...Hahaz I performed 2 impromptu(sort of lah!) pieces...was quite fun performing lah...feels quite big to be a teacher there=p
Hmmmzz training today Zurong injured his head...stepped on Vivian's foot and landed on his hip and banged his head...For a moment thought he was really gonna suffer concussion or sth...he was juz screaming on e court...lucky he seems fine thou...Hahaz den when go Sky Garden to eat poor Ah Peng had to be Zurong's "girlfriend" under orders from Jingxian to take care of him...really funny...hmmmzz now training we r doing all e basic stuffs...quite relieved bcuz I really need to build up my basics...a bit sad thou jiao4 lian4 dun let me play center but wanna me play forward...it's a bit hard for me as a forward bcuz I've lousy ball control n dibbling skills n dun have much vision to distribute e ball either...But ah well what he's doing is not wrong lah bcuz I really dun have e size to be an effective center...Think I'll go play bball at e CCs more often to brush up my skills...muz build up some more body strength too...getting flabby n weak after too long nvr exercise le=p
Monday gave Xuwen her b-day prezzie, which was a Swatch watch...hahaz really piss Huiying off bcuz tt was what she had intended to give Xuwen for her b-day too...too bad(makes monkey face=p)hehez e watch fits her not bad lah...but still feel tt a metallic watch would have suited her better...couldn't cough up e extra cash thou...but ah well glad she liked e present...hope she will have more time on her hands now (hahaz lame)
Hmmmzz I gtg le feeling really sleepy nitenite n sweet dreamz!! hmmmzz do give me some feedback about e website in e tagboard kz? Cya!!

Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have